The Online Dating Handbook

As a woman who grew up in a small town, ONLINE DATING was (and pretty much still is) non-existent, barely acceptable, and misunderstood. I have experience with FOUR ONLINE DATING SITES at the moment: Plenty of Fish, OkCupid, Zoosk, and Eharmony. I will blog about each of these later in more detail if you need help deciding which one to join or have some stories/opinions of your own.
 
For now, here is the ONLINE DATING HANDBOOK according to me; keep in mind, I'm someone in search of a long term relationship, and that desire guides the handbook.

Online dating consists mostly of guys having to chase girls. So yes, it must be difficult to be creative and to catch a girls attention when she is getting 20+ messages (depending on the site) a day. But as a woman getting 20+ messages a day we need to be able to sift through these using a systematic methodology.

1) THE PROFILE NAME: The name tells a lot about a person
Here are a few examples of people to delete
Guys with 3Xs - 'XXX' in their name i.e. EXXXtaticGuy101
Guys with 'the one' in their name - I don't think so, buddy
Guys who are too sensitive - i.e. if I see in their names something like - serenity, poet, sunset, heartbroken - that's just my personal taste
Guys who associate themselves with a sports team i.e. LeafsFan101 (really?! why do I care)

2) THE PROFILE PICTURE: So crucial! Because you can not only decide if you're attracted to the person, but you can tell many things about the person.

Here's who to delete immediately:
The picture of the abs in the bathroom mirror - insecure or overly confident and self centered, probably only wants to bang you.

The picture of the fancy car/guy in fancy car - if he is making it clear that he has a BMW or Lexus he is probably making up for something else... 

The picture of the guy with one or many 'hot chicks' - this is ploy a guy will use to show you, 'hey, look, I'm super cool/hot - if I wasn't wouldn't I be surrounded by hot chicks' - a secure guy wouldn't need to play this card

3) THE MESSAGE
If a guy passes the Profile Name/Picture Test, here's who to delete based on the message:
The "Hi" - a guy who just says hi, hello, a greeting with no content. Just because it's online dating it doesn't mean you can't put any effort into it.
The physical compliment - Yes, I know I have a beautiful smile, oh you think I'm the most beautiful woman on this site... Ladies don't fall for this! I know we all could use a little ego boost, but if the guy only bothered to look at your pictures he probably doesn't care as much about your insides as your outsides...
The generic message - saying you like my profile is not enough - if he doesn't specifically comment about something directly on your profile delete him. 

4) THE PROFILE: If he passes the picture test, looking at just his stat card can tell you whether or not you want to pursue him.

Things to look at:
Height - Personally, I don't date guys that are shorter than me
Kids - If he has kids, if he wants kids. I'm not at that place in life where I want to be 'daddy's girlfriend',  and I want someone who is at the very least 'open to having children' - this one you'll have to decide on your own. But don't compromise your decision in a moment of desperation. If you're absolutely not open to someone with kids (as I am at this point in my life) don't compromise because it will only get tricky later.
Education/Career - at this point in my life, I'm not willing to accept someone who has only a high school education. Why? because of the path of life
What he wants from the dating site - most dating sites will tell you a man's motivation, i.e. if they are looking for 'dating, but nothing serious' - If a guy makes it through the picture test, and the stat card he can still strike out here. Again, this is a handbook for someone looking for a serious relationship. It's good advice in any dating situation to make sure you're on the same level as someone, with the same expectations so that you don't go into it with the wrong expectations. And NO - you probably won't be the one to change that guy's mind about being in a serious relationship... Ladies, throw that fish back in the lake!


5) THE WRITE UP: Here you get to hear his voice, it's time to read between the lines as best you can. Do your best!
Here's who I always delete:
A guy's profile that is longer than yours - either he is in love with himself, or he is super desperate
The 'No Drama' - A guy who goes on about his past relationship, i.e. if he talks about the terrible ex-girlfriend or break up he had and how he is looking for someone with 'no drama' or baggage, chances are he has some of his own.
He is not looking for anything serious, just wants to see what's out there - don't indulge it

I follow these guidelines when online dating because lets face it, there are plenty of fish in the sea, and I just don't have time to go on a date with all of them. Follow these guidelines with some tweaking for your personal taste, and it will make the process that much easier.